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After Silver Leaves

from How the Light Felt by smut

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lyrics

You watch me trail along
Wanting to be closer than logic allows
I look up to you
You put me down
Hiding at the neighbors
Shushing as our friends call our names
Closer than comfort
Wrapped in shade

You call me by her name
But I was here first
And I was your girl

You live in dark corners to drag me in
I am eighteen, I find it romantic
Needing support and secrets kept hidden
Feeling rebellious, feeling gigantic
You weren't a good person but moments were nice
Ignoring my conscience for a touching the night
Drive to the hospital
Trying to wake you
Dragged from property
Right, see you later

You called me by her name
But I was here first
And I was your girl
You called me by her name
But I was here first
When I was your girl

Your hand over mouth
Decipher the sounds push to make
Say you're better now
Ignoring lies, I’ll guess it’s safe
I don't see you around
Unless you're on me, pressed against my face
Say you're happy now
It’s not the same, I need some space
Sculptures come to life and someone asks me if I’m famous
I’m shifting actuality, you'll stay the same as
When grass is wet and August’s cold
Meet in the car and have you hold me
A moment so kind, the windows misting
You ask if you're mine and then you kiss me
I think I have to go

You called me by her name
But I was here first
And I was your girl
You called me by her name
But I was here first
When I was your girl

credits

from How the Light Felt, track released September 8, 2022

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smut Chicago, Illinois

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